Episode #119 Compliment Your Critic

Three Problems

• When we ignore and avoid our critics, we ensure that we will never learn from them.
• As difficult as it is to listen to our critic, it is even more difficult to compliment our critic.
• At one time or another, each of us have been critical of others when we have felt threatened, jealous, or insecure.

Five Principles

• It is easier to accept feedback when we choose to view it as a commentary on our performance rather than a criticism of our character.
• Complimenting our critic defuses the situation and reclaims the power they attempted to take away.
• Our response to criticism is motivated by either self-preservation or self-discovery.
• We can choose to believe the best in others’ intentions even if the delivery or the tone of their criticism seems rude or hurtful.
• Every critic has the potential to become our ally, and each ally has the potential to become a friend.

Three Practices

• Remind yourself that each critique is a gift that warrants a genuine “Thank you.”
• Digest each criticism you receive with the people who know you best by asking, “Is this true of me?” and “How can I grow from this?”
• When you read an inflammatory post online, consider privately messaging its author rather than publicly presuming their tone.