Episode #102 See The Good

We often focus more on what we are against than on what we are for. This week, Dr. Michael Brown and Dan Costello encourage us to see the good in a world that tends to emphasize the bad.

Show Notes

Some of the students were very rude to her… would cuss at her, would threaten her. And my mom would come home, and she would still say the nicest things about those students.
Dan Costello

Three Problems

  • Our default as human beings is to focus on the negative.
  • Community based on complaining and commiseration is empty at best.
  • We often perceive everything and everyone as either all-good or all-bad, and this is a sign of immaturity.

Five Principles

  • We cannot control the behaviors of others, but we can always control our response to them.
  • Seeing the good does not mean that we are oblivious to the bad but that we choose to focus on the good.
  • Every relationship has components that are both good and bad, and every circumstance has elements that are both enjoyable and difficult.
  • There is nothing that can deepen a relationship more than conflict.
  • There is good in all people, in each pain, and in every problem… even when bad coexists.

Three Practices

  • When engaging in contentious conversations with those holding opposing viewpoints, seek to identify at least one area of common ground.
  • Commit to seeing each problem in your life as an opportunity for growth and resilience.
  • Whenever you find yourself giving into the temptation to complain, pause to remind yourself to see the good.