Episode #187 Raise Strong Kids

Five Problems

• When our primary goal is to keep our children safe, we unknowingly make them weak.
• If we take away our children’s problems, we sabotage their future problem-solving skills.
• Without intentionality, we will inevitably coddle some of our children more than others.
• Our children will never meet our expectations if we continually change the rules.
• We couldn’t imagine running a business without a mission statement or strategic plan, but this is typically the way we lead our families.

Five Principles

• Parenting mindset must precede parenting strategies.
• The heaviest weights we can remove from our children are those of shame, insecurity, and perfection.
• Many of the rules we make for our children can be summarized by a single rule, like “Be considerate.”
• We can set high expectations and demonstrate high amounts of grace at the same time.
• Our children will learn more through their failures than through their successes.

Five Practices

• Don’t do anything for your children that they could reasonably do for themselves.
• Let your children experience the consequences of their decisions rather than absorbing those consequences yourself.
• Allow your children to feel their feelings, rejecting the temptation to fix their feelings.
• Consider what it looks like to set fewer rules and to be strict where it matters most.
• Identify your family values, and connect each of these to specific family behaviors.